Welcome To Gothic-Retro Living Condos!

Gothic-Iowegian Realty offers the finest
in suitable Condo-style living AND with
benefits you NEVER dreamed of having!

ALL new residents recieve the warmest of welcomes!

Our late night patrols are top-class for
keeping Jehovah's, Mormons, and other pests
away to ensure your peace and quiet!

Just last week John Edwards tried to get in
and lost a testicle :)

We offer a 24/7 on site handyman for
any help or burials you need an assist with!

Our facilities offer gardening for those with
green thumbs, and each tenant is assigned
a private spot in the garden for planting
.....anything.

Children are welcomed and will enjoy
our fully functional swingsets.

For the "little folk" we offer our residents
free day-care during the week!

So Come On !

Make your reservation for a suite TODAY!